I accept

I have a serious confession to make. I have mixed emotions about Kaki Blue. Firstly, I love the script so much! I cried the first time we read it then I read it a few times more at home and had sleepless nites just bawling my eyes out. My husband woke up one night and asked me why was I crying, I just said the story touched me.
There are alot of things that are not being said in the script but somehow must be delivered during performance. Hence, I am terrified if we the actors cannot express these unspoken messages, the play will be a meaningless comedy. Honestly I am scared people might not be able to see how serious the message we want to convey.
Secondly, I could relate with the characters in the play. Ah Shan, Lin and Nee are ME!! I hated school, I hated to be herded like cows, I hated my parents because they fought all the time, I hated my father for hurting me. I am touched by their stories because they are all about me. A lot of the lines they speak, I have spoken when I was a teenager. That was of course millions of years ago! You can imagine how surprised I was thinking Mark could have read my thoughts, or that he had went back in time and found out who Tria really was.
It is very difficult for me to write all this but I feel that I must because we must be responsible as actors to play our parts well so that it will be a play that will make a difference to the young people out there who do not have the voice to say what is hurting them.
I had a long chat with Tati and Elaine about the play and how it affects us. I have told them things I haven't told people in a very long time. And how important it was to keep it a secret because I couldn't talk about it openly here in Malaysia. It might hurt my mother, my mother wouldn't believe me or people might laugh at me. We covered alot of topics the other night from child abuse to human trafficking to blind beggars. I feel blessed to have met everyone in Kaki Blue. I went home feeling loved and accepted. Thank you ladies!